Parenting Thoughts

A friend asked me today for some thoughts on parenting, what kind of biblical guidelines or principles do we follow. Since I wrote it down, I thought I would share it here. (This is just the tip of the iceberg, what came to mind when I had a few minutes to write...)

One of our biggest parenting "paradigms" is that we are trying to be an early image or reflection to our children of how God is. He is the Father "from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name" (Eph 3:15). And the most important thing that we want to give our children (although it is impossible for us to give it to our children unless God gives it to our children) is a knowledge of, love for, and trust in our beautiful Savior Jesus. 

He is faithful, so we strive to keep our word.

He is kind, so we want to be gracious and gentle.

He is generous, so we love to lavish our kids with good things.

He is awesome and holy and sovereign over all creation, so we must not allow our children to disregard or belittle the authority that God has put over them, namely, us parents.

When God gives commands to His creatures, it is never for insignificant or capricious reasons. It is for our good, for our protection, for our abundant life. In our parenting, we want to reflect the same purposing for good when we give instructions or restrictions. 

And for the same reason--because obeying God is essential for knowing full joy and eternal abundance of life--when our children disobey or disregard our instructions, we find it important to address the failure and, when needed, follow up with discipline. 

God's words are utterly trustworthy. And so it is important that (as much as is humanly possible), our Yes means yes, and our No means no (James 5:12), without games of counting to ten or bluffing with impossible threats of what will happen if a child does not comply.

Parenting is a tremendous responsibility and calling. We do it "as seems best to us" (Heb 12:10), and so frequently we feel (and are) woefully inadequate to perceive and respond rightly to the needs of the young hearts we are striving to shepherd. But what a kind Father we have, who supplies wisdom when we lack it (James 1:5), who set His love on us (1 John 3:1), and who has given the Savior and Mediator that our children need (1 Timothy 2:4-6).

4 Months Old!

 4 months!

3 months

2 months

 1 month

 2 weeks old

Dear Elliot,

What a big boy you are! When we were out on a walk with your big brothers this morning, one of the neighbor ladies out walking her dog made a detour to come over and see you. "I've been hearing about this baby, and I just had to come over and take a look!" she said. So your rolls are gaining you some notoriety!

- You are a big. boy. We haven't had your check-up yet to figure out your current weight, but you are full of lovely rolls, and as Miss Cherie at the school says, "You are just SOLID."

- You have gotten very strong and active. You love to sit, balancing on my leg and bouncing a little, watching all that goes on around you.

- You are still quite happy to take in the surroundings, when your brothers are around. However, when it's just Mom and you, sometimes you're a little fussy, wondering where all the action and adventure went!

- During supper preparations, you are normally a very good companion from your swing in the kitchen hallway. It's a nice time to chat with you a little bit while I do my kitchen busy work.

- Even more than that, though, I love to pick you up and squeeze you and give you a hundred kisses on your soft cheeks and fuzz-haired head. You are so squeezable!

- When you are fed and rested, you are still normally happy to visit other folks, but if you're getting tired and hungry, you normally prefer to stick close to Mom. It makes the hope of mealtime a little more tangible, I think...

- You have been very sporadic in your bedtime sleeping. Sometimes (last night) you'll get me up three times a night. But sometimes you'll just do one feeding. At least the hope of a good night's sleep is lovely! During the day, you normally sleep until 7:30 or 8am, then take a morning nap at 9:30am or so. We'll go out and do something outside for the middle of the day most times, and then all the boys head down for afternoon naps around 1:30pm. Blessed time...

- You are very chatty sometimes, cooing and singing and letting us know all about your thoughts. I love it.

- You really go to town on your thumb and/or fingers. Most common seems to be a combo of thumb and first finger, but any of them will do (even your pinky... with the rest of your fingers kinda jabbing you in the eyes).

- You are strong enough to get out of your bundling now, and it's that rather stressful transition to figuring out how to sleep when your arms start flapping around...

- You haven't quite rolled over yet, but you get balanced up on your side, and I think it won't belong before you can tip right over.

- As evident in this month's blue chair photo, you can hold up your head quite high now. You are a strong boy!

I love to see you grow, although I don't want to rush away the days when I can still snuggle you in my arms as a little baby. We pray for you each day that God will indeed, as your name says, be your God and that you will give your whole heart and life to Him. The Elliots (Jim and Elisabeth) who are your namesake were such a testimony that nothing given to God is ever wasted, and no sacrifice of what could temporarily entertain, interest, or fascinate us is worth the enduring joy of knowing Christ.

It is our church's memory verse these past weeks:

 But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith.--Philippians 3:7-9

May you belong to Him all your days, sweet son!

With love and kisses,
Mom

Vacation in British Columbia

At last, our trip to Canada! For all the uncertainty of getting there, once we arrived, it was such a delightful and fun time!

We saw God's provision and care over and over, and we loved having the special time with our cousins exploring beautiful British Columbia a bit! It went so fast, but we will savor those memories for a long, long time!

Waiting to get off the plane in Seattle

Saturday was a loooong day getting to "home" in Chilliwack, and Sunday we got to visit the Lasers' church and enjoy their lovely home, including the apple, pear, and plum trees. We picked beans and broccoli from their garden and had a generally relaxing and delightful time.

Monday, we drove 45 min to Harrison Hot Springs, which was a super fun outing.

Tuesday was Uncle Kevin's birthday. In the morning Ben, Kate, and I picked blackberries along the road to enjoy with our monkey bread breakfast, and then we went to an indoor swimming pool. We got to visit Decades (the coffee shop owned by Kevin's family) for lunch, and it was a great supper of smokies and corn on the cob, topped off with buster bar dessert in the evening.

We left bright and early this morning to return to Seattle for our flight home. The travel was exhausting, of course, but it was such a delightful trip! We loved visiting the Canada cousins and can't wait to see you again soon!