Women, Please Consider

As was mentioned to me this morning, here in Minnesota, we have two primary seasons: winter and road construction.

Well, road construction season is at hand, but that's not the only thing summer brings.  I don't think I consciously considered the effect of women's summer clothing until I got married ... and my husband gave his honest perspective.

I wonder what comes to your mind when you hear the term "modesty." 

Leave me alone.
Frumpy old women in turtlenecks and sweatpants.
Guys are the ones with the problem, not me.
Don't make me feel guilty about wanting to be stylish.
You are so irrelevant and out of touch.

This is primarily meant for women who are Christians, but if you're not, I have a word for you at the end.

For my sisters in Christ, I see two primary reasons why modesty is important.

First, for you.  God tells us, "Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly"(1 Tim. 2:9).  The message linked at the bottom unpacks that section very helpfully.  Bottom line, modesty is important because it's a reflection of our heart.

One definition of modesty is "dressing with reverence for God and regard for others." Sometimes we have to ask ourselves hard questions about why we wear what we do... Am I trying to attract attention?  Whose values am I reflecting?  What is my motive for wearing this?  Is my physical appearance gaining too high a place in my priorities and passions?

Second, for men.  Especially your brothers in Christ.  For many women, your heart may be right.  You have no desire to be immodest or pose a problem for others.  But sometimes we are not aware of how we may affect others, especially men.  The struggle for purity is strong and constant for virtually all men.  Their call is not just physical purity, but minds and hearts that are free from any impure thoughts.  This is a huge battle, and especially when our culture is bent on provoking lust and drawing their hearts away. 

More than once, Ben has cautioned me about wearing something that I saw no problem with.  "You don't know how guys are wired," he would say.  And I confess that I have been defensive and resistant to his intervention more often than not.  I am modest; don't be so picky! I would think.  But that does not reflect an inclination to seek the good of others who may be weak where I am not. 

"Rather determine this--not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother's way" (Rom. 14:13).

If you aren't convinced, you can hear a few excerpts of letters from Christian men who are pleading for their sisters to be partners in their fight for purity (click first link below).


And if you're not a Christian, maybe what the Bible has to say doesn't mean much to you.  Yet I urge you to consider, dressing with decency and modesty does not cheapen you.  On the contrary, it demonstrates to men--and to everyone--that you are a person of deep dignity and value.  You are not an object.  You are not willing to expose yourself to just anyone who walks down the street.  You are precious, unique, and worthy of respect.  Maybe that's not something you've heard before, but it's true.

For the message that prompted these thoughts, and a good thought-provoking listen, click here.
And another interesting message, which reflects on the origin of bikinis.